DATING AND DISABILITY ETIQUETTE

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When it comes to dating a Person with a Disability, it is a rollercoaster of feelings because, in as much as people are enlightened, some are still in the dark of the dos and don’ts that surround the life of a Person with a Disability. Most people desire to know the dynamics involved when dating a Person with Disability. They wish to know misconceptions surrounding dating and sex life for persons with disabilities. Well, an interesting soul by the name of Vilissa Thompson who is a social worker, disability rights consultant, writer, advocate, and founder of Ramp Your Voice! In her experience as a person with a disability in the dating world says, most people who expressed their interest in dating her lacked dating etiquette.

Vilissa, while sharing her story, said most people lose interest in her whenever she mentions her Disability. Everything becomes awkward, and some cross the line and become rude, nosey, and inappropriately address her. The mishandling motivated her to roll up a campaign dubbed ‘ResolveToRespect’, where she teaches people how to approach a Person with Disability.

When you are interested in a person with a disability, it is important to let things flow, and the desire to know what happened should wait until a proper rapport is built. On the other hand, as a person with a disability, you need to vocalize your discomforts and only talk about what you are comfortable with. 

Moreover, avoid pulling sexually related jokes, and do not objectify them. When sexual insinuations are made, it seems like all you are seeking is sex and not the person. Vilisa advises ladies that when a Prospect makes these jokes or statements, call them out on it and should never be scared of saying how you want to be talked to or what you want to discuss.

Vilissa further explained that because a person has shared their Disability, it should not be a way to sympathize with them and share inspirational messages; it’s boring. They don’t need it in the dating life. They also want to be treated like abled persons; they want to be viewed, treated, and respected as equal to you and not inferior because they are disabled. 

When dating a person with a Disability, improvise ways to make it fun and avoid seriousness putting in mind the communication etiquette. And questions are boring, so phrase them creatively and pay attention during conversations if you have to ask any questions. 

In a nutshell, persons with Disabilities love it when they are not treated differently from others. Do not expect them to change their personality to fit your expectations; they deserve and are worthy of being loved unconditionally.

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